"Marriage is ordained of God." This phrase alone tells me that marriage is sacred. To make a marriage be successful we must give our best selves. Marriage requires work. However, some knowledge that John Gottman discusses in his book The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has shed light on marriage that makes since. He says that marriages will still have disagreements and you do not need to have a perfect marriage. However, it is vital to gain skills and actually execute becoming more attune to each other and making friendship between the couple become an importance part of the marriage.
Learning this information has given me new purpose to my marriage. It has helped me make a goal to want to make my marriage stronger and become more like friends with each other. I mean if you think about it that is what brought us together in the beginning. We enjoyed each other. Though, with time, life becomes busy and we often get stuck doing daily things and running round helping people and meeting demands that we put marriage on the back burner saying we will get back to it when I have time. Then time passes too quickly and before we know it we have burned food popping and spewing out all over.
I have made a commitment to myself to do what it takes to make my husband my best friend and talk to him and treat him like my best friends. On Gottmen's web page he has a list of ways that couples can interact and maintain closeness and a positive view of the marriage. They are Be Interested, Express Affection, Demonstrate They Matter, Intentional Appreciation, Finding Opportunities for Agreement, Empathize and Apologize, Accept Your Partner’s Perspective, Make Jokes. These are all things that I saw that I myself can work on and try to become better at so that I can improve my marriage. The one I am going to work on this week is Express Affection. I challenge you to pick one as well and work on it.
Family: A Proclamation to the World.” (1995, November). Ensign, 25, p. 102.
Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2000). Die 7 Geheimnisse der glücklichen Ehe. Düsseldorf: Von Schröder.
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